This is a journey that I have to travel on my own. I don’t like it, even though sometimes I be so content being in my own space by myself. I do enjoy my loved ones and being around people I care about but they aren’t meant to climb the mountains you’re about to climb. This journey is different, it’s more than just wanting to have company or space fillers. God is calling us to higher heights and deeper depths with Him. That’s not for everyone. The homies cant go, family cant go, my lover(that I do not have) cant go. I mean unless you’ve been given certain instructions then thats different but as for me and where I am right now that doesn’t apply. As for all those unnecessary things/habits/mindsets/perspectives/people, they will take up space that GOD is trying to occupy. I am losing a lot of people. Not because anything happened but they turned away or the desire to be in their presence God is changing it because He’s giving you new desires. It hurts. The enemy was using that to play mind games with me, telling me no one wanted me around, I am to much, no one cared about me, just lie after lie after lie. For a second I was actually believing him and all it took was me expressing how I was feeling out loud for the noise to stop. Exposing the lie. A lot of the people I used to talk to and spend time with, I just don’t anymore and that’s okay. Relationships as I once knew it all came to an unexpected end. It was a hard pill to swallow but it was for the best, I guess. I recognized it, mourned it and moved on.
Every time God wants to do something new in my life, he would require me to sacrifice something. Over the past 2-3 years, its been certain habits(smoking, drinking and having sex), certain music, my job, my boyfriend(ex now). You don’t think I was struggling to let those things go? I was for sure because I still enjoyed it. He didn’t take the desire for those things away until I really was serious about letting them go.
Stay Anchored in Truth.